Star Wars: Futile Empire

While i am sure that some may think that I am referring to the decrepit status of the Star War Franchise, they would be incorrect.  This is much better, in fact to use three words THIS…IS…AWESOME!  It turns out a US “spy satellite” is suffering from orbital decay, and will slam into the Earth at a hundred thousand miles an hour.

While that speed might be exaggerated a tiny bit, the odd of it hitting you are exactly 50%.  It either will, or it won’t.  What is unique is that apparently the school bus sized, I am betting not the “special school” kind, is apparently loaded with toxic fuel.  So that if it crashes into stuff, then a poisonous gas will kill those left alive by the crater.

While some may say that this is a ploy for Bush to define himself as the only president to defend the globe from interstellar terrorism and the obvious need for a missile shield,  they would just be cynics.  No, dear friends the President isn’t that desperate for a legacy, cause if he was we would be invading Iran right…now.

Also you could not literally com up with this stuff before Wednesday, because the writers strike was on, so you see there is no underhandedness that we have come to expect from the Bush Administration over the last very long seven years.

What will be fun is that the Navy -Accelerate Your Life- has been given the duty to shoot this sucker down.   Now the problem exists that despite the existence of the video game industry, and Fauex News attempting to slander it, shooting said satellite is not going to be easy.  They could just graze the thing and then send it on a direct path “accidentally” straight towards Mecca.  (Which would be kinda cool in one way, and cause massive problems)

Then supposing that they do shoot it down, there does exist the possibility,  that the thing may crash and burn on somebody anyway, so then everybody and their pet monkey will be trying to shoot it down.  (That includes Dick Cheney and His pet monkey Bush)

Imagine, India launching its missiles only to have Pakistan think this is a first strike to obtain Kashmir.  Then we will have the French with their twelve guys on a ladder, the whole of their space program, shooting frogs legs and patte trying to knock down the satellite.

So sit back and watch the show, cause this episode can’t be as stupid as the last three, Star Wars:Futile Empire.

Yippy Hippy

If there is one thing that can bug me more than religious conservatives, Christian and Muslim, it is the ideological mistake that spawned Hippies. Flower power is nothing more than turning sunlight and carbon dioxide into oxygen, and who amongst us needs that? (Guess that will get me in trouble with Virescent)

The latest consternation I have with the useless hippies is the new doucheness coming out of Berkley. While enjoying the most liberal of ridiculous policies because of the college, which for a time had a naked Indian, Native American, walking around campus, has decided to target the Marines as evil. (then of course the excess of commas will tick of Conservative Amazon-which is a misnomer)

As if planted by agents of FOX news, this douche giveses gives perfect ammo to show how ridiculous people are on the left by claiming the Marine recruiters are bad and somehow a threat to the community. Their stupid excuse is that this is a protest against the war, rather than the protests that hippies had in the Vietnam era where they called military people baby killers. (I guess that lack of coherent logic makes sense if you smoke a half ton of weed before breakfast)

They then have a 14 year old girl speak at the town meeting, my guess is that a 14 year old girl has a lot of experience in dealing with life and all its hardships, that they “Don’t hate America, but they hate war.” Well good for you, most everybody hates war. Those who don’t are usually gun runners or crazy.

What I don’t get is the “Conflict never solved anything.” bull Huckabee, that these idiots preach. Conflict solves a lot of things, it can sprout new problems when you don’t do it right, we should probably ask the leadership at Carthage their opinion, oh wait- they don’t exist because the Romans killed them. Bad Romans, don’t you know that violence never solved anything?

We should then speak to the Iriqios Nation exist as a buffer between the US and Canada, well shucks again, they don’t exist cause we beat them repeatedly with the help of fake treaties. Maybe we can speak to the Confederate States of America what their opinion is on the subject- damn when will I learn, they lost- and are now voting for Huckabee, so I guess the South may indeed “Rise Again“.

Lets also remember that we didn’t hear a peep outta the Balkans, that place in Europe where Republicans said it was treasonous for Bill Clinton to commit troops in attempting to bring democracy to a place rich with ethnic and religious conflict- nothing like the history of Iraq- when the Soviets were running the joint, mostly because if any group started messing with the other one, they all got run over by Soviet tanks. Being iron fisted is should not exist in all cases, but there are times when it is necessary. When dealing with the Middle East it probably should be the default mode.

Lets be clear war can be a brutal terrible thing to experience, especially when the leaders who are entrusted with the public trust betray that pact by having a shotty plan with no thoughts of troop withdrawal, Damn you Truman! But it is at times necessary, acknowledging the horrors that exist and making the decision knowing that their sacrifice will mean more than ones reelection. Stupid Jefferson. (UVA-ers cringe, while VA-Techers, well hell they can’t read so they can’t be mad at me)

What I am saying is this you disgusting little maggots out there in the Mary Jane smoking, hemp wearing, non bathing, French loving, Valentine’s day celebrating, Obama crushing, but McCain voting, terrorist pitying, nativity scene stealing, non football playing, dodge ball boycotting, tag promotes isolation saying, crapshoot of a town in Berkeley is that it may be your town, but it is our country- so appreciate the sacrifices those Marines accept so that you can be Yippy Skippy