Due to what some may call soul searching, self examination, inner reflexion, I have discovered that while some of my more recent writings may have had one or two humorous points to them, the overall tone has been very serious, academic even.
Well not today!
While I cannot take credit for the inspiration behind many of the jokes written below, I did reformulate the language of them in order to not be accused of plagiarism. Then again having such low morals and expectations seems to have worked out well for our President.
Signs that you are a Fundamentalist Islamic Terrorist…the cheap joke here would be to say you are either Arab, or Islamic, but this is a sophisticated site. So instead, you deserve to be ridiculed and possibly water-boarded, but not tortured, if any below describe your Middle East country of choice…
1. You have declared a Jihad against Pokemon, because it promotes Zionist principles - even though everything about the game shows it was created in Japan.
2. You refine and sell heroine to pay for the murder of women and children by using suicide bombers at crowded shopping markets, but have a moral and religious objections to the consumption of alcohol.
3. You consider the ideologies of the West, such as being able to vote, women not dressed as bee keepers, and television to be dangerous, but you routinely carry around a rocket launcher, and an AK.
4. When receiving your first cell phone your first thought was how you could use it to attack US or Israeli convoys, instead of calling friends and family.
5. Burning down embassies and rioting is the way you show that stereotypes of Islam being violent are untrue.
6. You demand that the land you lost while being the aggressor in multiple wars be given back to you, and to punctuate the point that you are ready to be a part of the International Community by chanting “Death to Israel! Death to America!”.
7. You arrested a Teacher for letting her class of 7 year olds name a Teddy Bear Muhammad, yet having 2 million people named Muhammad is fine, even if they be violent and vile people.
8. Having a relative being killed while attacking the Israeli Military is proof of atrocities by a Zionist government, but were that same relative to kill women and children at a crowded market it is proof he was a hero.
9. You cite that “Land for Peace” is what you want, only when you are offered Land for Peace, you turn it down and say you want more.
10. You care more about killing your enemies children, than you do about taking care of your own children’s future.
The only way that these can’t be funny in a depressing way is if they cease to be true, then they can be funny ha ha. Islam is represented by the people who are the loudest and most visible of its followers. Those happen to be vile, despicable, cowards who are not shunned by the majority of the Islamic world, merely quietly, and not so quietly, rooted for.
Many of the Islamic world feel this is unfair, and how dare we call a faith of peace to be so violent. They neglect the fact that much of Middle Eastern hatred of the West is rooted in the Crusades, which may have been violent, but also over 500 years ago.
So it is that we hear of the Palestinian People celebrating the attacks of 9-11, and the Saudi Arabian government get a free pass on an education system that fostered those attacks. If you don’t like it then I dare you, Declare A Jihad On Me.
Why did the United States recruit and train Muslim extremists (many foreigners), instead of pro-democracy Afghans to fight against the Russians? The United States main concern was to give the Soviet Union its “Vietnam.”
I remember that video that was shown around the world of dancing Palestinians on 9/11. But I wonder how come the video of Israelis dancing on 9/11 did not get the same attention in the mainstream media? See http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=575834042418696847&q
Man you are probably one of the least informed delirious people I have ever come across, we did not recruit or train the Mushahadeen, the religious fanatics that you are talking about. We did supply them with weapons to kick out the Soviets, and “give them their own Vietnam” because they deserved it.
Also there the pro-democracy movement that you talk about in Afghanistan in the early 80’s was vitually non existent, and by virtually I mean there was none. Also I don’t see what the connection between the Palistinians being a smarmy people celebrating the deaths of thousands has to do with anything but show they are undeserving of a country because of their inane and backwards practices. They put to death a girl because she was raped by her brother, but then you probably think that is a sound practice.
There are also a lot of muslims that live in Israel you dolt, so try to keep the slander of a country to a minimum, though from the comments you have left you seem to think that only Western oriented countries do bad things, never mind the horrific atrocites that Muslims call “normal”
You claim that “the pro-democracy movement …in the early 80’s was vitually non existent,” well then the extremist fundamentalists must have been non-existent, otherwise why would the United States recruit foreigners like the Egyptian Sheik Omar Abdel Rahman and the Saudi Osama Ben Laden? Many foreign foot soldiers were recruited to fight in Afghanistan.
During the Clinton Administration foreign jihidis helped out with Bosnia. While the United States did the bombing from the air, the jihadis did the ground work.
Regarding what happened to the Palestinian girl, this is not a wide spread practice and this is not an excuse to have collective punishment of all the Palestinians. There are human rights groups in Palestine and they could be doing a better job if their land was not being occupied and the infrastructure was not constantly being destroyed by the Israelis.
I do not think that only Western countries do bad things, but I want to see that Western countries acknowledge their wrongdoings; instead the mainstream media only highlights the negative aspects of the Muslim world. There are many human rights activists living in Muslim countries, but the mainstream press does not want to acknowledge this and instead paint the Muslim world as one monolithic group, who all think and act the same way. Despite living in democracies Westerners have not been able to stop the wrong actions their governments have been doing in other countries.
Whatever it is you are smoking, and by the fact that you keep defending Islamic Terrorists I am guessing it is an opium based product, you may want to down the dosage just a little bit. Likening the groups that are headed by violence driven people like Rahman and Bin Laden, and saying they were the “pro-democracy” movement is probably the stupidest thing I have heard in a long time, and I went to school with conservative republicans.
We did not “recruit” terrorists like Bin Laden nor the footsoldiers that followed their lead. What happened, in the place I can reality, is that Bin Laden got kicked out of Saudi Arabia because he was really upset with the Saudi Royalty being an ally of the US and desicrating Muslim land with our women driving and practicing human decency. Since there is is a strong undercurrent of this disatisfaction he was booted out. He went to Afghanistan on his own accord to join a Jihad to fight the Soviets, as did the foot soldiers you defend. Thus it was because of the own ideology of the religion of Islam, along with his own twisting of its teachings, not at all a policy of the United States that got these “people” to fight in Afghanistan.
What we did do is start to give these guys weapons, most notably the Stinger anti-aircraft weapons which turned the tide against Soviet forces. Given the fact that the Soviets were arming and helping the Vietnamese, which engaged in illegal torture practices of our soldiers, we were looking to deplete the Soviets of manpower and treasury the way they did us. So in the cosmic outlook we were merely paying it forward to the Soviets.
Your defense of the Palestinian people overlooks two major facts, the “human rights” groups you speak of are the groups also known as Fatah and Hamas, known to the rest of the world as terrorist organizations that have as their policy that Israel must be destroyed. Not exactly the warm and fuzy kind of people you seem to think they are. Using the tools of reason, by looking at the past and present behavior of the Palestinian people it is not hard to assert that the very DAY they are given a country, they will merely declare war, get beat, and we will have to start this arguement all over again.
There is a debate that goes on in Western countries over what is the right thing to do concerning public policy, and how to accomplish that goal. What is not seen in these Muslim countries is that same desire to find the right thing to do, otherwise there would be a debate on how to find a solution with an Israeli state that the Arab world has tried to destroy twice instead of the discussions they have now which are “if” the country of Israel should exist, or “how” it should be destroyed.
The bad image of the Middle East is not the “mainstream liberal evil media’s” doing it is the very actions, and the non actions that the region takes. Whenever the Klu Klux Klan asserts that it is a “christain” group, that assertion is condemmed and disproven by Chriastian groups who understand that the purpose of their religion is to bring about a more peaceful world. When the same is spouted off by Bin Laden and his ilk, their is a defening silence from those who would be termed moderate Muslims, as though they are approving of the target, though not the means.